Well here I am....again

sexyshareefa Sun Oct 30, 2011 10:04 am

After a long talk with Jon our life plan has changed yet again.. He and Mike (nicoles hubby) have decided to go into business together (heating and cooling) i was happy and devastated at the same time.. No move to north carolina that I have looked forward too since i was 19. Stuck surrounded by toxic family, but the potential to make loads of money is endless.. It was a head to head battle for days.. I still have my days of feeling sorry for myself, but he said he had changed his mind about a baby. He said if I thought I was ready to try again then he was too. After 2 miscarriages I went back and fourth and called nicole. Here she is trying to get preggers as well.. I feel as though I finally have something to look forward too.. I'm happy and scared.. I think another miscarriage would put me over the edge. Then...
I was working outside at doc's office and I ran into this woman. Her name was Lana and she had a 1 year old little boy. She said she had 2 more boys but they were in school. I told her we were contemplating a third and she asked how old my kids were. I told her and her kids were the same age.. Then she told me about her 2 miscarriages and how devastated she was but here she was with Luke. (I hadn't mentioned mine)I almost fell over.. She told me at one point someone told her to stop looking out the rearview mirror and look through the windshield at life and told me to do the same when it came to the miscarriages.. I truely believe God dropped that woman straight in my path. I called Jon and told him everything, and here we are.. ttc:)